The tour rep described it as a scenic boat cruise around the spectacular Tassie coastline where whales, dolphins and sea birds frolicked in front of our digital cameras. Admittedly we may have built this up slightly in our excitement, but there were definitely some relevant details that didn't get mentioned... or heard perhaps.

We were off to a bad start when the three of us (girls' weekend) rocked up late to the tour office where the coach was ready to depart and a mob of angry tourists glared out at us.

Gathering sunglasses, handbags and cameras with lightning speed, we boarded the bus bound for our luxury catamaran where we would soon be sipping sauvignon blanc and relaxing in comfortable surroundings while gazing out the window at the pods of whales splashing in the gentle waves.

Not to be.

The boat that greeted us turned out to be considerably smaller than the one I imagined. Plus, there was no inside which was unfortunate since it had suddenly turned very cold and one of us gals was wearing a short skirt and gladiator sandals. (Fashion first, ladies.)

Bewildered tourists piled onto the boat while our enthusiastic young guide warned that the front seats were not for the faint-hearted. Needing no further encouragement for possible adventure (the sauvignon fantasy had quickly faded from our minds) we proceeded directly to the front row (which, we did not fail to notice, was the only row with seatbelts).

With all on board and us mustering our nerves of steel, our crew brought out the wet weather gear... full length, heavy duty, weatherproof red suits. It had become apparent that gladiators were probably not the optimum footwear choice on this occasion.

Next they brought out the sea sickness pills. That's where I started to panic which, unfortunately for everyone, manifested itself in shrill laughter.

Relevant facts:
1. This was to be a three-hour 'cruise'
2. I've never been good on boats
3. I'm strapped into the front seat of a flimsy motor boat wearing some sort of weather-proof hideous fashion nightmare
4. I paid a hundred bucks to do this

Any hope of backing out now was long passed, so I knocked back my sea sickness pills (herbal, I might add - further reason to panic) and braced myself.

As the jet boat shot straight out into the wild ocean framed by a gloomy sky, we clutched onto our handbags and prayed.

The tour guide was one of those guys who wakes up every morning, eats a bowl of Nutrigrain and races out to scale cliffs and wrestle lions. His enthusiasm was literally boundless. His positive attitude was impossible for even me to be cynical about. In the first five minutes he had our complete trust. As the boat sped towards a four-metre high ocean swell we needed only look to the broad grin on his tanned face to know that nothing could possibly go wrong.

Seconds later the boat hit the tip of the swell at speed, lifted off the water, and hurtled us through the air for several seconds before slamming down onto the swirling, black ocean.

When the screaming died down, we discovered we'd come upon the southern Tasmanian coastline - a desolate, watery wilderness. Spectacular black, mossy cliffs camouflaged groups of playful seals and different varieties of sea birds. Natural blow holes and weird rock formations led into unexplored caves. The boat approached the mouth of one of the caves and there we were surrounded by rocks and dark water, with cliffs looming straight up above.

The charismatic guide displayed a true passion for the nature and wildlife in the area, and I was surprised to find his description of the sedimentary rock that formed the cliffs really quite interesting.

I'm not sure if it was the enveloping terror or the herbal nausea pills that prevented sea sickness in the thrill ride that followed. The swells got bigger, the sky got darker and the screaming got louder. After several encounters with the ocean swell I discovered that this high-speed lunacy was actually the best fun I'd had in ages. Plus, it's surprisingly restorative to scream yourself hoarse without fear of causing anyone any unnecessary panic.

When we arrived back on dry land, no one seemed bothered that we hadn't seen any whales, dolphins or penguins (that is, not counting the penguin floating inside the bottle opener key ring I bought at the gift shop).

If you find yourself in Tassie and feeling the need for speed, then I strongly suggest giving this cruise a go. We bought our tickets from the Salamanca markets in Hobart (also definitely worth a visit), but you can also buy them from their website.

Find out more about Tasmania.

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