Twins! Shout the Weekly and the Woman's Day, both running with the billowy dress Angie wore to the Screen Actors Guild Awards as proof that she has a double bun in the oven. I can't see a bulge under that thing, but the colour's unfortunate. Looks like Angie had a struggle changing Shiloh's nappy before she left the house - and came off second best.
You know the drill, guys. It's probably safe to assume she's continually pregnant 24/7 unless we're all informed otherwise.
Nicole Kidman is gonna be miffed. There'll be miniscule media interest in her baby if there's a double dose of Pitt-Jolie gorgeousness on the way.
Rachel Hunter's on holiday with her boy toy, who's not too shabby, in the Day and the New Idea. But who cares about that when they reveal that Our Rach voted for Queenstown to appear in the world edition of Monopoly, currently up for public vote. All that and she used to hawk the nation's favourite ice cream! A true patriot.
Woman's Day is interested in what pint-sized twin Mary-Kate Olsen had to do with Heath Ledger's death, with dodgy overtones to the star's involvement. Why did she call her private security instead of 911 when alerted to the emergency by Heath's masseuse? New Idea also focuses on the Mary-Kate angle, reporting Ledger's part-time lover played therapist to the troubled star in the final months before his death.
NW dedicates a whopping seven pages to the short life and mysterious death of the local boy made good, but that's all I'm going to delve into. Gossiping about a dead person feels wrong (I know! A conscience) and sort of gives me the creeps. Pick up the mags if you want the full story.
The Britney circus continues after the singer was hospitalized last week, and you know how that's playing out - like a modern Shakespearean drama. Madness, intoxication and some dastardly villains to boot. Let's just hope the story ends happier for Britney than it did for Othello, Macbeth, Romeo and Juliet.
Father's Day is a way away but former All Blacks are showing off their infant daughters in the mags this week - Frank Bunce made an epic dash from London for the birth of Victoria-Anne, while frosty-locked halfback Justin Marshall shows off his daughter Lucia and shares tales of his brood living in southern Wales.
In the least surprising news of the week, Nicole Richie is snapped out and about in the Day looking as thin as a pin less than a month after the birth of daughter Harlow. Did anyone expect anything less? She was never a chunky monkey to start with so of course she's going to revert back to being thin.
Hollywood's skinniest Minnie is apparently surviving on a diet of sashimi, seaweed and bun-less hamburgers. Is she falling back into her old eating issues? Keep your eyes on the thighs.
What's up with Kylie Minogue? While the Weekly reports she's reuniting with the Frenchman, Olivier Martinez, NW says she's hooking up with British Doctor Who star David Tennant. I have a celeb boyfriend for Kylie - how about Rove? They're both among Aussie's most beloved stars, they're both tiny (thus, he'll feel taller), and they'd just be so dang cute together. I know she usually goes for the Euro-suave types, but Kylie, give an Ocker boy a chance. In fact, I feel a Facebook group coming on.
Cheese alert! If you're not into public displays of affection then avert thine gaze from the Day's shots of Drew Barrymore and her latest boyfriend Justin Long. Their smoochy behaviour comes amid rumours that Justin's proposed to Drew, making him her fourth fiance and third husband - if they make it down the aisle. The happy go lucky actress is known for her changes of heart.
When toffs unite! New Idea reports that bean-throwing thespian Hugh Grant is to marry heiress Jemima Khan after their will-they won't-they, on and off relationship. Hugh will be barred from fraternizing with any 'arm candy' and shrewish ex Elizabeth Hurley. Meanwhile, it's cool for Jemima to still hang out with her text-twiddling buddy, Shane Warne. Heads up, Hugh! If you don't look sharp old Warnie will have his googly all over your maiden.
Not a week goes by without an update from Casa de Cruise, but if NW's to be believed the Cruise household is going to be a little bit emptier. Having had Suri with wife Katie Holmes, Tom Cruise has apparently lost interest in older kids Isabella and Connor and has left them to live with his sister and her kids in his old house.
"Tom loves his kids, but he has a new family, and it's very clear he and Katie are building a new life of their own."
Fair weather father and religious ringleader! Tommy Girl is a man of many facets.
Katie's not pleased that all this Scientology hoo-ha has overshadowed her comeback movie Mad Money,which apparently was a bit of a dud to start with despite Mrs Cruise's best efforts at promotion. Like the old saying goes, you can't polish a turd.
And if you ever find yourself feeling sorry for the rich and famous, what with the paparazzi houding them and their complete lack of privacy, take a look inside the NW at celebrity holiday homes. These multi-million dollar mansion from Malibu to Miami have got to ease the burden of public scrutiny just slightly.
And that's all from the mags this week!
Whatever Happened to the Spin Doctors?
Hasselbeck: Why Can't Obama Write His Own Speech?
What a Doll! Bindi Irwin Goes Plastic
